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Now you know and knowing is just a touch over half the battle.

Sarcastic Squirrel to Super Spoon Design: A day in the life of…(5/2)

Posted by goldwriting on May 2, 2008

1 – Foamy is back to take on cell phones users and car commercials, two things that are guaranteed to find you each day just because you woke up. [via ill will press]

2 – I would say I loved the tenacity of this wanna-be criminal, but it could also be a cover for sheer stupidity. This young man went into a bank and tried to cash a check for $360 billion dollars. There is one word that will never be used to describe this attempt at check fraud: subtle. [via Perez Hilton]

3 – Critics and fans of David Blaine can debate throughout the night and day about his demeanor, tactics and overdramatization of his stunts, but the man gets results. He went on Oprah earlier this week and accomplished his goal of beating the world record for holding your breath at a stunning time of 17 minutes and 4 seconds. Frankly, someone who can not breathe for that amount of time scares the crap out of me. He now is added to the list of scary things, right above Flava Flav. [via Starpulse]

4 – The ITunes you will now be able to buy or rent new movies on the very same day it hits the shelves in all major stores. Coincidentally, you will also be able to start ordering pizza, popcorn, math homework and human companionship though ITunes on a sliding scale of pricing. Welcome to your “I”xistence. [via Variety]

5 – Iron Man is just hitting the theaters today, but the weekend predictions of it hitting upwards of $75 million in box office have got the studios already planning for the sequel. If they bring in Mandarin as the next villain, I might just spontaneously combust with joy, which is a messy process, trust me.[via ComingSoon]

6 – I hope this is a demonstration of talent and not a real game, because if my opponent starting beating me this badly, I think I might swallow the ping-pong ball as a more honorable way to die. [via Pandachute]

7 – What would go on inside a therapy session with all the main cereal mascots? Now you know. Also, it’s about someone challenged that damn Cap’n Crunch on exactly where he got his commendation from. I wanna see papers, Cap’n! [via CollegeHumor]

8 – Rev. Wright has caused the Obama campaign a ton of heartache and trouble since he was shown to go on racist and violent rants against America and her values. He claims that we are still a racist country. Somehow I think the way to help ease his worries over that subject or maybe discredit his argument has nothing to do with going on national television and call him an “uppity n****r”. Thanks Matthew Modine for once again giving people a reason to tell all actors to shut up and look pretty. [via Starpulse]

9 – Just so we’re clear, Robert Downey Jr. really likes to throw scripts at walls. It helps him think. [via Defamer]

10 – With this stroke of genius you will never find yourself again wanting for that lsat bit of Key Lime yogurt at the bottom of the disposable cup. Those extra few drops of anti-oxidants and food cultures are surely going to put you over the edge from “sedentary mass” to “healthy, active demi-god”. [via swissmiss]

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